Monday, July 11, 2011

Helpers, Hot Flashes, and Cranky Vutlures

I'm Shelly. I'm a grandmother kitty. I have absolutely 
nothing to do with this post. Thank goodness! Patrice said 
she'd use my picture because I was cute and it's all she has.
Should I be offended?

Welcome to another week at Everyday Ruralty. Today we have helpers on our farm. I approach the topic of helpers with mixed feelings. There's always something to do and never enough hands to get everything done. We have had a variety of helpers, volunteers and some interns. Our experiences have been good, bad, and ugly! We are fortunate to have two workers this summer who totally rock. This spring we were unfortunate and had a volunteer who wrecked havoc(over $660 worth). It's kind of hard to say "There's the door. Now leave." when you're outside, but we had to make that point. The person was here with ulterior motives and messed up lots of things before we sent him away.

We have an interesting array of folks who show up to work on our farm. Let's look at the list.
  • I want to dance in the open spaces and express myself. Go right ahead, but not here! Next!
  • I'd rather work on a farm than at Walmart. Aaaa! Next!
  • I want to experience nature. Scary! Thunderstorms are part of nature! Next!
  • I want a husband so badly that I can't see straight. The farmer's a man. *wink-wink* Read my lips, bimbo- this is a farm, not an dating agency. I shoot in the expert marksman qualification and I don't share!! Next!
  • My mother says I never do anything and she thought I might learn to work if I came to the farm. Reject!
  • Could my husband work for you? He's retired and drives me crazy. We are not day care for retired husbands! Next!
  • I could get free veggies if I worked here. I could pick some for you and some for me. ???Next!
  • My husband abandoned me. I could be in the garden and clear my head. Waaaaaaa! (wailing and tons of tears) Waaaaaa! Can I send you home with a box of veggies? This might not be the right job for you.   Waaaaaaa! Ma'am, please don't use the bottom of my dirty t-shirt to wipe your tears and blow your nose. Here, let me open the car door for you. Now, drive safely. **whew! She's gone!**
Our helpers today are a youth group from a church and they seem pretty nice. Fortunately, no middle schoolers who need baby sitters! Also, none of the above!

Hot flashes- I was riding in the passenger seat of my truck while D1 drove to her job. It was in the high 80's or low 90's. I was getting so hot and uncomfortable that I couldn't stand it. I thought, "If these are hot flashes, I hope they go away soon." They did when I noticed that the seat heater had accidentally been turned on and was set on high! ;)
Cranky Vultures- It's my intent to get new photos of Carnie and Roadie, the two pre-teen vultures who still reside in our barn. This may be easier said than done. They are quite a bit bigger. They have lost their fluffy yellow feathers and they try to chase away anyone who enters. I need to muster my courage and get C.S.Farmer to get their picture for you! ;)

This is a totally random post.
Have a totally random week!
:)

11 comments:

  1. Gosh can I relate. I used to handle the volunteer program with a horse rescue and GESH - the people we'd get. Sadly, 99.9% with ulterior motives other than simply helping the horses.

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  2. Um, lady, could I have a job on your farm? I'd like to spend some time sitting on your porch and chatting away the hours with you because, well, I don't like to sweat! LOL

    Great post! I was laughing all the way through!

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  3. I like random posts. You have had some people show up that just make me shake my head in amazement.
    I am glad you have some great helpers now.
    I hope you have a lovely week and I did have to laugh about your hot flash. That was pretty funny.

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  4. thanks for all the laughs! the hot flash one was perhaps my favorite!

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  5. If only I could turn off my seat heater! LOL Sadly, it's not the cause of mine :o(

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  6. I like Random. It suits me:)

    I loved the hot flash (flush here, though I need the car heater turned up to hot even in July)

    And I'd like to work on your farm too, but if I have to put up with *these* animals (ahem - the one in the first photo), either a) I, or b) *it*, will have to make a quick escape.

    :)

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  7. I enjoyed your random post! Especially the bit about the hot flashes and how you're mustering up enough courage to send the hubby into the barn to take photos! Hahahaha!

    Have a great, totally random day!

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  8. Dear Patrice. I throughly enjoyed your post today and I can so relate to what you say about the hired hands to work on the farm.

    The worst kind are the kids of someone we know and respect or our own relations. It's awkward to say no to them especially when we need someone to work on our dairy farm in the summer especially during haying time.

    They all think that their kids will learn to work if they send their kids to work on our dairy farm because at home they don't do anything.

    I like your responses to prospective workers, lol...
    Sometimes they screw up big time which is very costly especially with expensive equipments. I could write a book on the subject... and probably you too.
    hot flashes, too funny...

    I think that you need to disguise yourself as a vulture with a vulture outfit so you can take photos of them.

    I totally like your randomness today. JB
    .

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  9. Good grief! It really is hard to find good workers isn't it. I'm still giggling about the cart seat heater being on high! That is NOT fun! Have a great rest of the week!

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